David's Best & Worst PS2 Games of 2005

By David Rasmussen
22nd Jan 06

It’s been the best of times, it’s been the worse of times. And as we begin a brand spankin’ new year, 2006, we take a look back at 2005 and the games worth checking out (or worth passing up even if you can find it for under $20)! (As always it’s in alphabetical order starting off with the best of 2005).

Best of 2005

Burnout : Revenge
I know, I know, I haven’t reviewed any racing games (let alone street racing games) in any real depth this past year, and yet I note the power of the latest Burnout game. Burnout : Revenge is going to be your go-to choice for racer game of 2005, that and Burnout 3 : Takedown (which you should be able to find these days for $20) and Gran Turismo 4... Not games like L.A. Rush or Need for Speed Underground whatever (though I heard the Next Gen game Need for Speed : Most Wanted is good).
Anyway if you always wanted to turn a car into a delivery system of explosive glee without ending up on a Homeland Security alert list then here you go.

God of War
Despite the fact that the year saw a batch of less than plesing ancient world fare (Colosseum : Road to Freedom and Spartan : Total Warrior coming to mind) you can’t go wrong with the beat em’ up of the ancient world that delivers the glee and joys of beating evil into a bloody pulp time and time again. Yes, the game IS short but I dare you to not play this over and over again, enjoying it each and everytime!
With upgradable weapons, a vast list of moves to learn and pull off, powers, as well as lovely levels filled with both a nice variety of monsters and some challenging platforming you have yourself a fine game.
That and there’s even a sex mini game, whoo-hoo!

Gran Turismo 4
The second racing game to check out this year on the PS2. Yes, it took a long long long time for it to come and that coming equalled the spade and neutering of it’s long promised online feature which would have made it that much more fun, yet the game is still good. With a vast variety of cars making you work hard to “catch ‘em all”, as well as solid racing you find yourself given a delightful racing treat in this game.
Still wish it had online, despite the fact I don’t do online, but at least it’s a good racer.

Incredible Hulk : Ultimate Destruction
Few Grand Theft Auto “clones” can aspire to be a worthy “clone” of said game, this is one of those.
Yes there’s no excessive violence or sexuality but this game features large worlds with many chances to explore and take on a variety of freeform side missions that do Grand Theft Auto proud. The freedom in this game is just like Grand Theft Auto, and that’s what counts. And it’s also good that you have lots of action and hard hitting super hero antics to go through in this game, as well as a wide variety of moves to learn and deal out against enemies. Oh, and you have a ton of unlockables which is also sweet.

Medal of Honor : European Assault
There were only a few decent WWII games out this year, and of these only two were worth talking about. This game, and Call of Duty 2 : Big Red One. I like Medal of Honor, do the math.
Now featuring squad based combat you find the game expanded abit with teammates you can control (and can deal out death well), as well as missions that are great fun and exciting. The only problem is that this game is short, but at least it’s good while it lasts. If you can find it for $20 or so buy it.

Psychonauts
This overlooked gem from one of the fathers of the point & click genre cannot be recommended enough. If you can get ahold of this platforming bliss then you’ll be pleasantly surprised with the joys you’ll find playing this wonder of gaming delights. A recommended game for certain.

Ratchet : Deadlock’d
The fourth in the Ratchet & Clank series, and the first to not feature Clank as a major part of the game. I wish the game didn’t have so many Arena battles, but it’s still recommended. Though (another flaw) the game didn’t really do much to go into new terrain, which I hope it does in Ratchet & Clank 5. Still I think it should be something for you Ratchet & Clank fans out there.

Resident Evil 4
Finally making the leap of faith from the GameCube, RE4 is now a PS2 game!
Yes, there are hiccups. The graphics are a tad beneath the GameCube version, and it’s controls at times are not quite as smooth and silky as the GameCube’s (which is solid). Still it’s got new content and if you are a RE fan who doesn’t have a GameCube you’ll want to check this out. Anyway this isn’t going to be as much of a pest as RE5 since RE5 is going to be on the PS3 when it comes out, so you’ll have to buy ANOTHER new system just to keep following the RE series! Bummer! Enjoy this before you have to scrounge for a PS3 when it comes out!

Sly 3 : Honor Among Thieves
The Sly series is leaving the PS2 (no doubt headed for the PS3 ala Resident Evil 4) and I couldn’t think of a better send off for the series than this game. A platformer without equal, and worth your time to play. Though one note … skip the 3-D levels. Yes, there is the glasses and all but you’ll probably be happier just to play the levels in normal mode… you’ll find out why after trying it for the first time.

(The) Warriors
Based on the 1979 Walter Hill cult classic film of the same name, consider this the Akira of American cinema… only with more gangs and less psychic powers. I am in the middle of the review of this game right now, but everything I’ve seen playing this to date makes me so damn hyped about this game! I am so hyped about this game, as a matter of fact, that I’m going to tell you in my review of this game (coming shortly) why this is probably the best of the movie adaptation games of 2005.

We Love Katmari
You know you love Katamari, you know you must have it, so why not embrace the power of the Katamari and roll with glee! Roll it up, roll it all up! Joy, people, joy joy joy!

X-Men Legends 2 : Rise of Apocalypse
Remember 2004’s X-Men Legends? This game continues it and continues the joy of the series. If you loved the first game you’ll come back for more. If not? Now is a good time to check it out! Trust me! One of my favorite super hero themed games of the year.

And now…
The Worse Games of 2005

Arc the Lad : End of Darkness
Thanks, Namco! Thanks for taking one of my favorite RPGs of the past (Arc the Lad : Twilight of the Spirits) and totally taking a dump on it! Thanks a lot… now never do that again!

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory
Movie games are bad enough on their own, taking the opportunity to “change” the story to make it video game “worthy” is worse! Taking on the “role” of Charlie you’ll find yourself cast in the name of chocolate, ye not guilty… eck. No longer just on the “tour” to see the sights, now you find yourself righting the wrongs of the other “guests” by either seeing to their “punishments” (eck) or battling the “Wonka Bots” made by the strangely robotically inclined Mike TV who, well, didn’t make Wonka Bots in ANY of the movie versions! Hell, since when did HALF of the things in this game even happen! And don’t get me started on the lousy control system or the terribly repetitive gameplay at times! The controllers will make you sick to your stomach and the mind numbing gameplay will work worse on you than a chocolate sugar rush crashdown. Bleah! I find this game cast in the name of (bleep)iness! Ye guilty!

Colosseum : Road to Freedom
Ladies! This game is for you! Have you ever wanted to micromanage the life of a studly beefcake of a gladiator and watch him work his moneymaker like nobody’s business during training days, while working your button thumb during mediocre “realtime” combat? This is going to be your go to game… only if you don’t want to have real fun playing a better game like God of War or The Warriors (set in the ancient time of 1979). Otherwise this dull repetitive gladiator “sim” button masher is not going to be your cup of mead, shaken not stirred.

Conflict Global Terror
Let’s see… what’s worst! 1) A game about “global terror”, or 2) a game about “global terror” that has characters on both sides of the equation who suffer from a bad case of the retards! Hmm… both! Anyway there are far better games out there for squad based combat (Rainbow Six : Lockdown, Ghost Recon 2 : Summit Strike or S.O.C.O.M. 3... Or, if you have an XBox360 and patience, you can wait for Ghost Recon 3 coming soon) so don’t play this game!

Fantastic Four
Considering you can find far better super hero games this year (Punisher, Incredible Hulk : Ultimate Destruction and Ultimate Spider-Man) why would you want to play a mind numbing button masher like The Fantastic Four! Don’t play this, avoid it! Wait for game creators to give the Fantastic Four the Ultimate Destruction slash Ultimate treatment, then they might turn out a recommendable game.

Hello Kitty : Roller Rescue
You know what? If the game sounds boring then odds are the game really is as boring as you probably think it sounds, even if you ARE a Hello Kitty fan! Burdened with kind of wonky controls, lackluster gameplay and overall dull content this game is not worth giving even to female gameplayers… in fact you should consider yourself an enemy of women if you give this (bleep) to female gameplayers! Nuff said!

L.A. Rush
Boring street racers in a 101 flavors of street racing fluff. Sure to be lost in the shuffle in 2006 and delegated to the bargain bin shortly. Play Burnout : Revenge or Gran Turismo 4, or if you own an XBox360 go get Need for Speed : Most Wanted. Even if you were “burned“ by previous Need for Speeds you‘ll finally find a reason to love the series as of this version.

NARC
Well, what do you know! Despite the fact it got a big “boost” from news medias who know nothing about video games (being the biased mindless media they are) the fact is that NARC is still a stupid game (even with the whole drugs as power up spiel)! Don’t be conned into owning this flop of a game that can’t even deliver on it’s “Grand Theft Auto Clone” promise! Go play something better.

Neopets : The Darkest Fairy
Are you a person who is fond of the internet Neopets site? Do you have a Neopet and go there often? Then don’t get this game, stick to the online version! This so called “Neopets” game is an insult to your intelligence, is nothing like the PC version you’ve come to love and adore, and will make you hate it’s creators more than those SWIFT BOAT people hated John Kerry! Promise!

Spartan : Total Warrior
Yeah, just what the world needed, ANOTHER DYNASTY WARRIORS CLONE! This and Devil Kings needs to be avoided… yes, even if Devil Kings has that cutscene with that hot blonde female making all the sickly hentai flash game pornographic moaning while being cuddled by that girly man character… what the hell! And by the way what the hell is with the “moaning” of Lin in Dark Cloud 2!! She sure doesn’t sound sick! In fact this bed ridden “sick” girl sounds like she’s getting in “touch” with herself under that sheet, in an entirely hentai way if you must know!! WHAT’S WITH THAT!!
Oh, the star of this game is abit like Prince of Persia… in that he’s allergic to mid level falls since they seem to kill him… wimp! Kratos can jump from bigger heights than THAT and not die! What a wuss!

(The) Suffering : Ties That Bind
Now don’t get me wrong, I liked the first game… but why is the sequel just a rehash of The Suffering with only different backgrounds and a not too innovative improvement to the “Hulk” side of Torque? Oh, and more “I see ghosts” moments… I think. Sigh. If you loved the first game and just want to do the same thing again you’ll play this, but if you wanted a brand new coat of fresh innovative gameplay on the sequel then you’ll probably find fault with Ties That Bind. For a sequel it’s just more of the same, so much for innovation (unless you believe that there’s no need to change something once it’s “perfect”, then you’ll love this game.)

Xenosaga Episode II
The game that doesn’t know when to stop showing cutscenes! It’s sorta like the Energizer Bunny of RPGs in that it’s cutscenes keep going… and going… and going… and going… and going… that and you’ll find yourself detached from the characters and their stories faster than you can say “URTV?” Sheesh!

That’s that! I know, I know, taste is subjective and some of my picks might not suit you. Sorry. But this is my picks and I hope it helps you as we go into the new year and you start thinking back as to what games you might get from last year, especially as they become available at lower costs. Happy hunting!

-- David Rasmussen 22nd Jan 06